Ireland

Since being in London I've felt a bit trapped. Living in London is expensive so any money I earn seems to just disappear and frankly, when working Monday - Friday, I just want the weekends to hang out. I certainly do not want to be rushing to an airport and sorting out accommodation blah blah blah. In any case, Easter holidays have come around and I've opted to visit Ireland. It was never really high on my to-go list but flights were cheap so ...

Some of you may remember how I helped that man fix his boat when I was in Italy? Yeah that was through a website wherein you stay with people who provide you a room and food and in return you help them out in some way. It could be working at the farm, fixing boats, gardening etc. In Ireland I was helping out the Wall family on their dairy farm down in the very rural town of Mullinavat. 3 hour bus trip from Dublin airport. Rad.

(Scene from the kitchen. Reasonably sunny innit?!)

Joseph is the son (and the guy who put the farm on the website) and he lives with his Mother and Father - Joan and Pat. In typical Irish fashion they've got a massive family but most of the other siblings have moved out or away (one is in Melbourne coincidentally enough). Joan has recently had some hip troubles so for a lot of the time I was kind of her personal assistant. Other times I would help milk the cows, took a trip to the Cow Mart to sell some cows with Pat, general gardening and otherwise helping out around the house. It was a nice experience but I must say that rural Ireland has some odd aspects worth noting ...

(Beer drinking isn't odd ... not doing it more often is a bit weird though)

For example, the constant talk about people dying. Because families tend to be quite large it makes sense that family networks are even larger so when someone dies it spreads throughout the town like wildfire. When driving around Joan would point out the houses with people who had died from things like cancer / stroke / heart attacks etc. It felt a bit grim to be honest. The general atmosphere was a bit downcast despite the beautiful weather.

(Joan kept saying she hoped the dog wasn't 'taken'. I assumed by Jesus or whatever but no! People come and steal puppies to sell them! This is their third 'Toby')

I went to mass one day with Joan just to see what it was like. At school we had to go to church so I know the general idea but back then it was still pretty boring even with the Rev trying to jazz it up a little. Unfortunately it seems some things never change. I had to enter through the 'men's' entrance and listen to a lot of talking. Joan was doing a reading so I wanted to see her and, yeah, that was nice. However, not being raised in a religious household it all seemed a but samey and a bit eye-rolly at times but it was pretty short and culminated with an upbeat choir so I shouldn't complain. I quietly opted out of the Eucharist but donated a single euro to the cause.

(It's a shaky picture as I had to be discrete. Still got looks)

Joan was not a great cook... The first night there I had a piece of chicken that was so dry it was solid served with vegetables that had been boiled so much they no longer held any nutrients. For lunch we had salmon (why?) served with half a steamed cabbage. A few times a kind of soup/sauce was made from a powder packet labelled 'farmers vegetables' but clearly contained nothing of the sort and was generally poured over whatever was on the plate - even if there was nothing on the plate. Potatoes were served unpeeled on a separate dish and looked like rocks. Potato rocks waiting to be peeled and consumed for their starchy contents.  At least potatoes are cultural, right?

Cows are a bit crap you guys. They really don't like being around humans, they're pretty stupid and my god they just LEAK faeces and urine. Just pours right out of them! It's almost unbelievable until you're standing behind them attaching the milking machine. The cows are milked twice a day and have to be herded into the right paddock for grazing. Besides that they don't really do much except occasionally moo. Keep it up cows!

(Herding cows in style)

I arrived in Dublin roughly midday and, after a couch surfer cancelled ON THE TRAIN THERE, I had to check into a youth hostel. I haven't been in a youth hostel for a while and I was a bit reluctant to get back into that mindset of pub crawls and going to 'recommended' restaurants etc. but it wasn't too bad really. I did end up going on one of the pub crawls which turned out to be pretty cool but otherwise I was out of the hostel for most of the time. I managed to squeeze in the leprechaun museum, The Guinness storehouse, the big sights of Dubbers (Trinity College, Christchurch cathedral, The Castle of Dublin) and a fair few beers between.

(I'm a fucking leprechaun)

When I started drinking beer back in the day it didn't really taste that good I'll be honest. However, it was cheap and everyone else was drinking it so I just kept it up and now I'm a pretty big fan! Guinness was always that dark liquid that I could never conquer though. It just looked dense ...

(There she is)

Coming to Ireland though it was a must and surprisingly it's not nearly as bad as I either remembered or thought I remembered. It's pretty good! At the storehouse they had fudge made with Guinness, you see how the beer us made, advertisements blah blah - the whole Guinness situation - then finally you can go up into a bar that over looks Dublin. Unfortunately Dublin isn't exactly a 'tall' city (by any means) but view from on high are always nice. Especially with a beer in hand (and in beard).

(Yes, admittedly a posed photo - note flat Dublin. Flatlin)

On the second day I took a bus trip over to the west of Ireland where things are supposedly 'more Irish'. I want to say The Corrs are from here but some quick research tells me they are from a place quite close to the east coast - complete other side of the island. I was mega hung over from the pub crawl the night before so the three hour bus ride was a strange haze of semi consciousness, scenery, and snacks. Once there, there was a brief tour from a painfully awkward tour guide and then it was  back on the bus to check out some LANDSCAPES.

I'll admit at this point I was still not up to scratch so missed the first hour or so of the tour (sleeping) but caught on later. The main destination was the Cliffs of Moher which turned out to be legitimately beautiful. I got some pretty nifty photos including some with me in them - an oft difficult feat when travelling alone. We also stopped in this picturesque country town for lunch. Yes it was very touristy but it was right by the ocean but had all of these cool fields with wild flowers and cows (more cows) chilling out in them. All these sights culminated in another three hour bus ride back.

(Three hour bus trip back?! Jesus I'd rather just ... )

Although I didn't really plan it I ended up taking a trip into Belfast to visit my friend David from when I studied in Miami back in 2007. Some of you may remember David from that time there was a streaker at the MTV movie awards. It was good Friday around this point and for some reason (religion) Ireland will not allow anyone to buy or sell alcohol on good Friday so at 12am sharp bars stopped selling the fun-juice which meant a fairly early night. Fortunately, most people started early so were pretty ok to go home. The next day we went to see where the Titanic was built (didn't go in) and just hung out really! I had a plan to catch back in Dublin so around 6pm that evening I hauled ass BACK to Dublin airport to fly back to London.

(David's world stage debut feat. Hayden Panettiere)

I liked Ireland! I was worried it would be similar to England and while yes there were some similarities I think it was distinct enough for it to be a stand alone venture. Once I hit Northern Ireland I could see some of the things I'm used to from London but Dublin was notably different I thought. I didn't drink as much as I thought probably due to the family I stayed with not being drinkers much at all but I had my fair share. Ireland is cool you guys.

Scotland - Glasgow

This marks my first foray into the country to the north. For a while I've intended to visit my friend Kirsty who I met in Portugal. She was working in the hostel when we met and we just clicked I suppose. So now - almost a year later - I've finally gotten the time/energy to venture up to visit her.

(This is her profile picture so she can't hate me for using this)

I do want to point out though that trains are like 75 pounds! Extortionate! Flights are cheaper but I just massively can't be fagged with schlepping to an airport and waiting blah blah. It's the Australian in me I'm sure ... airports are not to be taken lightly! A trip to the airport is a several-hour long slog as far as I'm concerned. So in order to justify the cost I opted to experiment with the sleeper bus option. To be clear this is a bus that supposedly allows you to actually sleep (i.e on a horizontal surface) and isn't a regular bus that goes at night. Which is all probably just as well as the journey takes 8 hours. Result?

(PRISON BUS)

To be fair I did sleep reasonably well and it's half the price of a train. I arrived in the land of kilts and gingers or whatever somewhat weary and curious. Most stereotypes of Scottish weather have proven so far to be pretty spot on. The main weather pattern for my time in Glasgow could be described as 'drizzly' or just simply 'grey'. Not willing to have my spirits dampened so quickly Kirsty and I took a stroll down Sauchiehall street which probably isn't pronounced how you think it is and saw the wonders of Glasgow at 7am on a Thursday morning.

(Can't be bothered rotating this. You get the point)

I wouldn't say Glasgow has much in the way of AmAzInG sights to see but it was nice to stroll around the town and the park. It seems Glaswegians are pretty stoked about this guy Lord Kelvin. He's got like a park, a river, a hall and TWO subway stations named after him. Here is a list of some of Lord Kelvin's achievements.

- A mirror galvanometer. Awesome.
- A form of temperature measurement
- The second fucking law of thermodynamics

Perhaps he warrants the hype. Who knows? I certainly haven't met him.

I didn't really have any particular need to go sightseeing - I just enjoyed the casual strolling and chatting. Besides, the weather wasn't exactly conducive to daytime frolicking so we just kind of wandered around the city. We spent some time at the Necropolis which is a somewhat dramatically named cemetery that gave a cool view of the cathedral and a beer factory.

(There it is!)

This was followed by beer (not from the factory). We did that a lot actually - drink I mean. Really at any opportunity. ha.

(...and from a variety of vessels)

I spent some time with Kirsty's housemate, Iona, and her boyfriend Adam. We went to the Barra markets which I guess would be described as a dilapidated and sparsely populated marketplace where people sell crap. Want a collection of old VHS films? You got it Lassy! Want a single shoe? It's yours. East Glasgow it seems is best avoided.

(Pictured: rusty paint can, VHS player, a different rusty paint can, a single shoe, a bowl ... so much more)

To be honest with you I didn't really notice much difference between England and Scotland. Walking down the main strip they have the same shops and aside from a curious difference in accent that varies in strength from the light word differences to the downright unintelligible. For those among you unaware - Scotland is trying to get independence from the UK. It didn't really impact my stay but ... it's worth noting. I don't have an opinion.

We all went out on the last night and it was awesome. I won't go into the details but needless to say I got a hi-5 from some rando for my amazing dance skills. I just sort of punch my arms out and move my legs... it's tricky to explain but obviously it's the best dance in the world.

(sexual fiasco)

On my way back I decided to stop through Manchester to visit my friend Eliana. It worked out to be cheaper to go through Manchester on my way back to London anyway - go figure. I was a bit tired so we had some soup and what not. Returned to London in the evening and fell into a slumber ready to get back into work on the Monday.

Quarter Life Crisis - survival guide

I am a modern man. As a bearded homosexual that lacks passions and has the emotions of a 45 year old woman - I feel that I am more than capable of living in this modern world of ours. I'm working as a teacher, I have friends, good family, high spirits and all that shit. So why is it then that at the tender age of 25 I have become so reflective of my life?

To begin, let me give you some context. As a teacher it is largely my role to stand in front of a class and shout at students to shut the fuck up and sit down and do some god damn work. It can be pretty trying but undoubtedly my entire year of education has trained me in the art of dishing out detentions, telling kids off in many different and unique ways, and of course the sacred art of the death stare. How more people aren't joining this profession is beyond me. I feel like I may have liked it at some stage but a part of me may have manufactured that memory to get me through the days.

(or through the hour)

I've never had a relationship. I honestly don't know if it's something I'd be interested in or if I'm 100% awesome by myself and don't need anyone else. I sleep around, sure. I'm a functional adult male. However there have certainly been people in the past that I have wanted to continue something with... but it has just never worked out. Cry for me, Argentina.

Finally I should mention that I'm living in London and not my native Australia. This means there is a certain extent of isolation and unfamiliarity with my surroundings. That is to say, when feeling down I don't necessarily have the same ability to go to a comfort zone as I'm intrinsically out of it. I'm enjoying London though so I can't blame that. However, I'm sure it isn't helping the situation!

So I supply you, newly loyal readers, on the tips and tricks to helping you overcome your self-entitled, wanky, excuse to be miserable - quarter life crisis. You may relate to some and not so much to others but I'm sure you'll glean something from this at the very least.


Do: Decide you need a new career... and of course tell everyone including your co-workers this.

Do not: Have any idea what you want to do or how you'll go about achieving this change.

Teaching is pretty much the best job ever because of reasons. I love marking over a hundred tests every few weeks. I super love having to break up fights in the classroom and of course I super mega love that empty feeling at the end of the day when one feels completely defeated. That was, granted, a lot of sarcasm in one dose but you get the idea. So what now? Perhaps you should try to network your way into a job instead of going back to uni and studying like a savage. Network with your vast amount of ... or at least your small pocket of friends. Success is just around the corner.

(patronising new mug purchased? check)

Do: Go out drinking on strange nights and stay up way too late.

Do not: Remain well rested and energised for your bright future.

Getting into work at 7:00am with a raging hangover is just the ticket for those riding out a quarter life crisis. Of course you will have selected the worst possible day to do this and you'll accept the consequences with as much responsibility as you can muster given the situation. The students you encounter will all become magnified and as your hangover starts to fade, time will slow down. One day will be split into pre- and post-hangover and your whole sense of time will be wiped out the window. Don't fight it, just hope others don't question you on the day's events.


Do: Tell everyone everything you're thinking and feeling.

Do not: Express yourself through productive mediums at healthy intervals.

Who cares if the person has just coincidentally sat down opposite you at Starbucks. Bleed your heart out to them. Just dump all of your emotions on any, and all parties within your proximity. You have become a martyr to your own cause now and people need to recognise! You are surely the only person to be going through these feelings. Feel free to elaborate on that guy who has you down and your entire history together up until this point. Don't forget to mention how you hate your job and how expensive London is. Finally point out how exhausted you have made yourself but how it's not you it's your quarter life crisis. People love hearing about it.

(this un-funny comic brought to you by the INTERNET)

Do: Wear yourself out to complete exhaustion

Do not: maintain a healthy lifestyle whatsoever.

This requires you to stay up late, wake up early, not eat much, exercise, and then plan shitty classes in any gaps between. Frankly if you have any energy at all then you're not quarter life crisis-ing hard enough. You should have moments when you stare unblinkingly out the window for inappropriately long amounts of time and you should have difficulty forming coherent thoughts - such as what you did the day before. When you go to the gym don't expect a whole lot to happen as you lie on the stretching area's mat and stare at the ceiling mouthing words to your favourite songs on your headphones.


Do: Go out drinking with that guy you liked even after he says he doesn't want a relationship.

Do not: Keep your distance.

Because you're totally over him right? Because you think it'll be fun to just be friends right? Now watch as you start becoming insecure about every facet of your life and then get secretly miffed when he's talking to someone else outside. This is also an opportunity to reflect about your financial situation and how you have very little to your name. Ace. While out drinking you should probably also participate in karaoke or something else humiliating in front of a crowd just to really get into the swing of your mid 20s.

(Like this fucking PLAYER!)

By the end of this you will be so out of sorts that all you can do is write an internet blog about it laughing at yourself. Ha.


I should note that I am ok. In actuality your outpourings of support have been absolutely the nicest things. I'm a rational enough guy to see what I need to do to get myself tip-top so I'll just plough my way there. Expect to hear about it!

Get Kris a Kareer.

I decided the other day that teaching isn't for me. I was sitting in front of a computer staring at the screen and dreading the day ahead and I decided right then and there that it's not a path I'm going to pursue. Spending 80% of my time telling students to sit down, be quite, stop hitting each other, and to stop stealing each others' pens is just exhausting. It's not why I wanted to be a teacher. So I'm going to explore other options before I put my fist through the shell of bone that is/are my student's skull.

Only problem IS, my faithful children of the internet, is that I'm not actually qualified to do much else. Oh sure, I can wait tables like a god damn CHAMPION and, yeah, I've got retail skills - but nothing meaty. Nothing substantial that I can wave in front of an employers face and be all like "yeah guy, I'm the man for the job".

(I'll even awkwardly smile at your racist jokes)

This leaves me in a bit of a quandary. How am I supposed to move sideways or up in my career progression? Fortunately I'm of an adequate age to be starting again in this sense but I'm in a different country dontcha know. I don't have time nor the economic capacity to be going back to uni to learn this sort of thing! Besides, I'm surrounded by examples of people who have succeeded without university so I know it can be done. Just gotta get down and do it.

My strategies for now are to write in this blog more frequently in case I end up going for a job in social media (this includes ramping up my twitter account: https://twitter.com/KrisComma ) and also to start networking. It's who you know, not what you know - right? I'm going to try and use the gay network to the best of my ability. I'm not saying that I will prostitute myself by any means but if it comes to a situation where I'm trading sex for steady employment then .... it's a grey area I'm willing to look into. Don't you judge me!

 

(Case in point, I do not know Barack Obama personally - hence why he has not employed me)

I can write to generation Y! I can convey tone! Sure my punctuation is all awry and, yes, my turn of phrase can be quite roundabout... but some people (myself) think it's endearing (because it IS) so I'm not going to stop. Let's hope operation "Get Kris a Kareer" goes well. I'll keep you posted.

Kris.

Sweden - Stockholm

I think the reason I spent so long in Dalarna was because I had arranged a place to stay in Stockholm quite far in advance and was simply hanging out until it was acceptable to go there. Stockholm is known for just having no room for anyone so I was glad to get a response. Which is why for about 6 days I stayed with my new friend from Couch Surfing, Andreas, in his apartment a little bit south of the city.

I read a book that was translated from Swedish about a woman in a small suburban town down south who gets kidnapped then raped/tortured in the basement opposite the house she lived in while watching her family through a tv screen. Anyway all the characters seem to dislike people from Stockholm and in my experiences from Gothenburg and Dalarna it seems people THERE don't particularly like Stockholmians either. I have no qualms though. They're a fashionable and fun bunch. No one seems to say sorry though. Not out of selfish disregard for others but it seems they don't want to have to burden the other person with having to answer with something like "that's ok blah blah".

Must say though, where Stockholm city starts and ends is a little confusing as it's spread out over several islands. Seriously look at the aerial view of the city. Looks awesome doesn't it! Definitely impressive that a city was constructed here at all ... seems like a lot of work. After spending around a week there I like to think I managed to get my head around it. The names and pronunciations were a bit beyond me at times but geographically speaking I was starting to get it.

(Right? Cool!)

(Like for example this is ... umm)

Andreas and I actually had a quite a lot in common, not least of which was our preference in TV shows so after having a few drinks and dinner on the first night we settled in to watch some Netflix. On Wednesday I explored the area/islands of Sodermalm and Gamla Stan. Sodermalm is the cool 'hip' area and Gamla Stan is  the more old-time 'tourist' area. I went to some really cool cafes and I saw some interesting buildings. After a day of aimless walking I met up with Andreas and some of his friends and we went bar hopping until we ended up in some friend of a friend's apartment and ultimately at Tradgarden which apparently is the Swedish summer hotspot for young adults. It's the sort of place that will never play anything you actually know because it's too cool for that. Did hear that one Solange Knowles song though. You know the one.

(I'm cool you guysss)

(pictured: stuff)

Next day I went to the ABBA museum because I simply HAD to! I was never really a massive fan of ABBA because they're not really part of my generation but like everyone else I certainly know their big hits. Which I later downloaded after the museum. You can get an audio guide that has the members of ABBA explaining things to you. The stuff they were saying was pretty much explained on the plaques around the museum but it was nice to hear their voices. I actually kind of enjoyed it all! It covered their rise to fame from Eurovision, explained why they were so popular in Australia (seemingly more than the rest of the world??) and their eventual break up. I thought that they hated each other but no! They catch up every now and then it seems. They're never going to get back together though. Agnetha (blonde one) has released a new album and of course there's the Mamma Mia musical and movie. You know, the one with James Bond. Go and listen to Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! again - it's kind of really funky!

(Agnetha looking fierce)

Friday I went to, and subsequently didn't enter, the museum of modern art. Wasn't in the mood for art. I went to a castle on a rock instead and while gazing out across the water I saw the amusement park and HAD to go. Worth noting: I found a camera memory chip thing sitting on a rock. You'd be amazed how many people I mentioned it too automatically assumed child porn. No I've just checked and they're someone's holiday snaps. I'd really like to return it to them so I'll do some research. Hmmm. Anyway the amusement park was a lot of fun! There's one particular ride that is like a carousel swing but very high up which offered the BEST view of Stockholm I could have asked for.

(That tall one right there)

Friday night was drinking with some more of Andreas' friends and then watching as Andreas ate the spiciest sausage in Stockholm and apparently the world. Like a champ he finished it and then later on the walk home from the station he threw up a bit also like a champ. Then drank yogurt like a champ. Then dealt with the digestive aftermath of the devastatingly spicy sausage like a champ. Saturday we just both recovered until we decided to do something traditionally Swedish in the same way that a traditional Australian activitiy could be going on a Walkabout and hunting with boomerangs. We ate surstromming.

(Stage 1: initial regret)

Surstromming literally means 'sour herring' and is essentially herring that has long since rotted itself into being. It's powerfully offensive to all senses and is not to be taken lightly. After two simple bites I gagged and had to spit it out. I had to gargle with Dr. Pepper to wipe the taste out - my dentist is probably shaking his head. However my dentist doesn't read this blog so next time I see him I'll lie. The amount of flies this dish attracted was astonishing, and a true sign of the fact that this 'food' should not be approaching any human orifice. Ever.

(Even light would prefer to bounce off it)

(terrible)

Finally on Sunday we decided to do something with our lives and we went for a bike ride around the various islands. Bought some cool stuff, had another amazing burger, had a beer, then went to the vasa museum. A museum solely dedicated to the biggest Swedish war ship made (in 1628) that subsequently sank about 500m after setting off. I actually liked that the museum was quite specific; all the facts became unusually relevant. If it had been a general boat museum I would not have been nearly as interested. Afterwards we had some more beers and tried some non-disgusting herring which was absolutely amazing. Possibly the best thing I ate in Sweden. God I'm hungry right now.

(artist's interpretation)

(Andreas and my herring. MINE)

I met some cool people in Sweden. It's a really interesting country so I'm glad I was able to spend about two weeks exploring it. Now however I'm flying back into London and I have no apartment and no work until September. Massive drainer. I'm hoping to visit Sweden again soon to see some of the friends I've made but it would be a lot better if they just came to visit me in London :D. Yeah!

(A statue clearly touching his own nipple. Now immortalised in stone)

Sweden - Dalarna province

Dalarna is a somewhat northern province of Sweden and is the perfect example of Swedish countryside. It's the sort of place you'd see on postcards - red houses, trees, lakes, horses ... it's just a nice area. It's all considered quite ... yeah Swedish. Also in Dalarna, being mostly countryside, you'll find mostly white people. Blonde hair and blue eyes e'rrwhere. Children of the corn. ha. It's nice though! They're like VIKINGS! Minus all the raping and pillaging of course. Swedish people really are quite beautiful, however, I mostly want to put that down to perhaps sexual selection. Blondes choose other blondes to have blonde children. I do want to say it's not like a country of models - they're very much within the realms of the average - but there's some creedence to the stereotype, yeah?

                           

                             (It's how they chose the colours of the flag.... No it's not)

I travelled to the Dalarna area initially to visit my friend Carolina who I met in Miami. That was back in 2007? That's dedication! A friendship with Kris is a friendship that LASTS!

Carolina was staying in her home town of Leksand. I had never heard of it but miraculously there was a direct (and cheap) train from Gothenburg so I jumped on and persevered through the 6 hour journey to meet her. Leksand is a beautiful town by the lake and as luck would have it (luck is the word I'm using) I arrived during the Classic Car Week. Which in layman's terms is when Swedish enthusiasts of American cars converge on the town to cruise about and make each other feel worthwhile for maintaining mobile chunks of metal. There are more than you think friends. It's a 'thing' apparently.

('Thing' certainly seems like the right word)

I met Carolina's boyfriend, Thomas, and we all spent the day catching up and drinking on Thomas' houseboat which - for the record - is the coolest houseboat I've ever been on. Carolina was staying in a big house right by a lake and the view was just incredible. I really mean it. Incredible. By the time we got to the car show I was in a really good mood. There were a lot of cars and a lot of Swedish being thrown about but I didn't really mind. Carolina and Thomas' friends were all lovely and were more than happy to speak in English. That ol' guilt about being raised to speak English came back for a bit but it seems so natural for everyone that I quickly forgot about it.

(Here they are)

(Go nature! YES!)

The next day we just had a coffee, grabbed some lunch and lay on the roof of the houseboat in the sunshine. However, I had just caught Carolina before she was moving down south with Thomas so my stay in Leksand was quite short lived. A brief sojourn if you will. Later in the afternoon I was on the train over to the slightly larger town (in relative terms) of Falun. I had arranged via Couch Surfing to stay with the Lingemyr family who picked me up at the station and took me to their lovely house not far from town.

(Boat-tastic)

Falun is famous for its' massive copper mine. It used to be the second largest city in Sweden and kept it (the country) going back in the day when it was all about conquering. It's also the reason for the all the red houses in Sweden as the remnants of the minerals were used to create the paint. That's why almost every house in Falun/Dalarna is this burnt red colour! Including the Lingemyr families' house it seems.

(Da mine)

Mona and Torbjorn were so lovely and accommodating. They've accepted exchange students and sent their two boys off overseas many times so they've got their head in that international frame of mind. We had a lengthy discussion over dinner about Sweden and as a consequence I now know a lot more about Sweden than could ever possibly be necessary but that can't be bad can it? It's a pretty cool country after all.

The next day was spent with my friend Daniel and he showed me around to the local sights of interest with his two dogs - Gertrude and Sarah. I actually didn't visit the mine as there were no English tours while I was around but I mean ... I saw the hole dug into the earth ... that's something, right? Instead I got to see some really nice places and have a great lunch in the sunshine. I was able to meet Daniel's horses and finally I went back to the Lingemyr's place and we jumped in a nearby lake at dusk to cool off.

(Dan and Gertrude walking around a botanical garden)

(Best friends)

After Falun I didn't really know where to go so I just went on Couch Surfing to see who was around and ended up heading to the small town of Alvkarleby to meet Joao and his girlfriend. It was a really small town that didn't really have a whole lot to do but that's ok. Turns out Joao is really into his indoor beach volleyball so he invited me to play that with him and some locals. I'm pretty sure the last time I played volleyball was in highschool and let's just say I wasn't exactly Olympics material so I was a bit uhh ... 'rusty' for a while. I am pleased to say though that I got a lot better until I was an actual contributing member of the team.

(Obviously not contributing while taking this photo)

The locals were all lovely! I really had a good time meeting them and it was nice staying with Joao. I think he's used to having people stay because he seemed incredibly at ease with it. I decided to make nachos because why not make nachos? I was able to explore the town on the bike but there wasn't really a whole lot to see. It's always nice to ride around though. It's certainly faster than walking. That it is. Stayed two nights then trained off to Stockholm. Next blog.

Sweden - Göteborg

"Why Sweden, Kris?" - WELL... I mean. How do I answer that? Why does anyone travel anywhere? I've been interested in Sweden for a long time and now that I've got the time and sheer proximity it seemed like a good time.

(The birthplace of my name. Not really. *ahem* The shop only sells woman's clothing.)

It's summer holidays in London right now so I have no work with which to worry myself so I booked a cheap(ish) flight and everything seemed good. Then the next day my house mates said they were moving back to their countries meaning I had to find a new place, then I found out that I miss out on a fun festival in Brighton, I miss out on a friend coming to visit London, my Swedish friends are busy or out of the country, and to top it off I kiiiind of met someone a few days before the flight.

Poorly timed to say the least.

Still I got on that RyanAir flight and flew the two hours to Gothenburg city which - for those in the dark - is the second largest city in Sweden. 10 points for naming the capital - I'll get to that later. I didn't buy a return ticket as I wasn't actually sure how long I want to spend in Sweden. Immigration didn't bat an eyelid at that though. Good on them.

(Swede-tastic)

In true Kris fashion I arrived without any knowledge of the city or the language. Fortunately for me the latter was not so much of an issue because Swedish people are mind-bogglingly good at English. Better than people in England. ha. I only say that because of the dreadful English accent that wafts around at some of the schools I've been working at. Confusingly enough though a common greeting in Swedish is 'hey' (hej) exactly as we say it so instead I have to say 'hello' juuuust so they know that I'm an English-speaking moron.

(I'll have the meatballs .... of course I will)

Gothenburg as a city has a lot of parks and nice restaurants but I didn't really feel like there was a whole lot to do, you know? There's an amusement park and a science museum but a lot of the fun just comes from sitting around and not doing a whole lot. Which is what I did! Everyone there was quite nice though and it was quite easy to meet new people - always a pleasure!

 (Game of Thrones - Gothenburg)

  I was staying with a friend, Gustav, from CouchSurfing. He's an ex-chemical engineer who is currently studying to be a doctor. Brains coming out the wazoo that one. Very nice guy though and was very kind to let me stay. We went out the first night and met some nice Swedish ladies and went around drinking. Ordinarily a fun thing to do but due to the damned amazing Swedish economy everything is expensive. Gustav had some Swedish beer he had bought cheaply from a trip to Germany (because Europeans can DO THAT) so we made do

.(Gustav and his boat; somewhat different cider flavours! Heavens!)

So what did I do exactly? I went up to an old Fortress but didn't go in as the people working there were on a lunch break. Wouldn't have gone in anyway. I went to Haga which is like a gentrified industrial area full of cafes and restaurants, I went to a rich-ish area to a bar that only appears in summer by the canals, I hung around Gustav's place and I also went for a ferry trip around the Gothenburg archipelago which was really nice...

(Look at dem ROCKS)

... Actually on that last one, Sweden has a really nice coastline with lots of small islands scattered throughout. The ferry system runs on their regular public transport system (yet another system better than Myki) so it was cheap and fairly frequent, too. I went to the island Branno where I had a strange sandwich from a strange couple in a strange cafe. I walked around the outskirts to a nice lookout point where, in the absense of anyone else around me, I took some selfies. Finally I strolled down back to the ferry to go back.

(What a beautiful ... view)

Turns out I completely the missed the centre of the island where their one restaurant is. How do I know this? I met Leopold who, despite living quite close to Gustav on the mainland, works on the island. He showed me some really cool bars around town and it was nice to see some cool places I might not have ordinarily seen. There's other stuff to mention about Swedish culture but I'll probably be spacing out Sweden over three blogs. I'll reserve some stuff for later - like how Sweden is actually full of beautiful people and ... food or whatever. I'll think of something.